Letter To My Younger Self
Looking at this photo I actually get quite emotional, not because this was a particularly emotional time in my life or anything but because this was me a few years before I became completely obsessed with my weight, before I had zero confidence and no self-esteem. All because of my physical appearance, kind of crazy isn’t it?
From the age of 11 I went off to an all-girls boarding school and this is where my insecurities began to manifest. My weight started to become a massive issue. For most of my teenage years and even into my early twenties I don’t think a day went past without me lying in bed at night contemplating my weight, worrying about the way I looked and telling myself ‘tomorrow I’ll eat less’. I would completely obsess about food and compare myself and what I ate to others. It was exhausting but at the time, being ‘thin’ was the only thing I thought would make me happy.
Having finally got to a place where I value myself AND my body I thought I would reflect on some of the issues I had when I was younger and what I would tell my 11-year-old self if I had the chance….
Prioritise Life, Not Looks
You have so much more to offer in life than simply the way you look, don’t waste time obsessing about your appearance and comparing yourselves to others. Any comparisons you make are probably going to make you feel worse. Put more time and energy into exploring your hobbies/ interests, sometimes distraction is the best form of self-healing.
EVERY Body is Beautiful
Your weight IS going to fluctuate. Your body IS going to look different to everyone else’s. It is what it is. So stop staring at the mirror, and don’t give yourself a complex that’s only going to fill your head with nonsensical body images that aren’t realistic. Learn to take care of your body and love it just the way it is, you’d be surprised what this can do for your body and mental health.
Positivity Over Popularity
Surround yourself with positive people that make you feel good about yourself. Don’t change to fit in with certain types of people, stay true to yourself and try not to follow the crowd all the time; being different is your best feature!
Learn to Accept a Compliment!
If someone tells you that you are good at something, BELIEVE them. To be honest I am still working on this but receiving a compliment however small should be cherished, they will keep you going on the days you feel overwhelmed with self-doubt.
Accept Your Mistakes
Mistakes happen for a reason, they enable you to grow and improve so embrace them. Don’t dwell on them either, accept them and move on because they are going to help mould the woman you become.
Be Your Own Best Friend
You are great at picking your friends up when they are down and reassuring them that they are beautiful when they (like most girls do) have mini meltdowns. This is a great attribute to have but you need to believe the same about yourself! If you are constantly judging yourself by your physical appearance, why should your friends trust that you are not judging them in the same way?
‘What you put into life is what you get out of it’
I truly believe that when you put positivity into the world, positivity will find you, when you put kindness into the world, kindness with find you and so on. I mean it’s not always going to be rainbows and smiles but I strongly believe that when you have this outlook on life good things will happen.
Lastly, I feel like this photo embodies your mindset before you allowed other peoples opinions to precede your own. Remember who you were when this photo was taken; when you didn’t obsess about food/diets and constantly wish you looked like someone else. Back when you were happy just being you.